Twenty Life Lessons from a Regular Mom

This March 28th somehow marked 19 years since I last talked to, hugged or saw my precious mom. Her name was Beckie and she lived a full, beautiful life in her 56 years with us that were cut short by colon cancer. My mom taught me so much that I have carried with me into my adult life and in my role as mom to my own big family. Despite the huge loss I still carry, I am mostly at peace and just feel deeply grateful for her life. She loved and encouraged well, was quick to laugh, had a sharp wit, cared deeply and was a good friend to so many.

As my heart and mind continually land on my mom leading up to this mile- stone of our loss, I have been reflecting on life lessons she taught me. She set a foundation for me long before I became a mother and I now see that I have grown into living my life with her ways in my heart and my ways growing from them.

As we look ahead to Mother's Day, I wanted to share 20 life lessons from a regular mom. Some lessons were learned from my dear mom and some I have learned on my own as I joyfully see life through a mother's eyes. These lessons are not in any particular order of importance.

1. Make small things special and beautiful. Bring in yard flowers or set a pretty table for no reason. Make normal life beautiful where you can.

2. Give gifts. Even tiny ones have a big impact if there is thoughtfulness in the giving.

3. Operate with a gracious grit. Be kind and caring but tough and persistent.

4. Get to know people, especially those you see often, like your regular bank teller, barista, or grocery store clerk. Let them get to know you. Sharing life with others is a great gift.

5. Create traditions in your home, like special breakfasts on Saturdays, certain desserts or meals at holidays, watching a family movie on Fridays, etc. These small things make impactful memories.

6. Keep going, no matter what. No matter how bad you feel, how hard things may be, how difficult someone you love may be at that time, etc. Do the next right thing with a calm, loving attitude and you will set an example for all around you.

7. Having good manners is important. They are not empty tradition, but a way to show others respect.

8. Host people in your home, whether or not you think it's perfect or looks like you want it to.

9. Remember people’s names and something about them so you can ask a thoughtful question the next time you meet. This gives great encouragement to people and is really fun!

10. Be a hard worker. There is beauty and dignity in working hard, no matter how insignificant or important the task.

11. Life may not go the way you want it to and things will get really hard at some point. Letting anger overcome you is never a productive response.

12. Be honest about the hard things, but do not dwell in them too long. Share your burdens with others and be a friend who will listen with care to someone having a hard time.

13. Be very quick to see God’s good gifts and be grateful. Every day is truly a gift and there is beauty everywhere if you have eyes to see it.

14. No one owes you anything and you are not better than anyone else. Treat everyone with respect and don’t tolerate those who are disrespectful of you.

15. Being quick to smile puts every- one at ease and laughter is good for your soul.

16. Learn new things, even if you think you may be really bad at them.

17. Watch less TV, scroll less and instead read more books or go outside.

18. Go to as many of your special people’s special events as you can.

19. Cooking is beautiful and feeding people also nourishes their hearts.

20. Ask questions and listen to others more than you talk about yourself.

I hope this list would make my mom feel encouraged and proud. It was easy to notice the small things she did that communicated big care for others, and although they were done quietly, they had a great impact on me. I hope she knows the joy it is to be her daughter and how much I appreciate her more and more the longer she is gone and the older I get.

Happy Mother’s Day to you and yours. May we all live lives that are filled with encouragement and make our families proud.

Kate Miller is a watercolor artist in Greenville. She lives a full, normal life with her wonderful husband, big crew of precious children and a lazy red dog. You can find Kate online at SweetBirdPress.com. Her work goal is to add beauty and encourage... and as always, be sweet!